A Nugget Story

By gisy

A Nugget Story

>once upon a time

>be no gunz

>go to gun store

>look at all the rifles

>finger fuck a bunch

>no boners happening

>pick up Mosin

>proper rifle

>feels good man

>get invited to the back to pick one out of the crate

>find old hex head, nice wood, kinda pretty

>taste the cosmoline

>gun store man laughs

>at home

>clean new gun

>takes days

>go to range, pop a few

>gun works better when it's treated with angry cossack hands

>one morning

>wake up to girl sitting in chair beside bed

>stern looking short girl, twin pony tails, fine facal features

>school uniform with a short skirt under a huge green wool trenchcoat

>feet don't touch the foor

>eyes meet

>both scream like little girls

>thrashing out of the bed manage to hit head on dresser

>black out

>wake up to find girl gone

>grab mosin from beside bed


>best impression of a conscript clearing a house

>last corner into livingroom

>peek around corner

>face to face with little girl

>both duck behind corner

>try agian

>she's standing at the corner legs wide, arm pointed at me

>"how dare you touch me!"

>be reasonable guy

>try to calmly explain that no touching was, or is, involved

>"I'll tell the commissar!"

>since when did we have commissars?

>title IX exists, so it's not a stretch...

>"put me down this instant you filthy capitalist!"

>oh hell no

>no fucking commies are going to start squatting in this house

>loudly demand who the fuck she is and how she got into the house

>she tears up a bit and runs through the wall

>or maybe into the wall

>she's not on the other side

>pretty sure stranger things have been seen

>welp, time for tea

>brew in grandma's royal albert

>tastes better

>leave it on table

>time for shit, shower, shave

>come back to magical justice commie sitting at the table drinking out my favorite tea cup

>bitch as the mosin beside her

>spots me

>"sit down, we drink tea like civilized peoples, We talk."

>not so much of an animal to refuse caffine

>begin to ask her who she is

>she interrupts "I is gun"

>that's not an answer

>"me, gun, same. Even an american can figure this out."

>politely explain that guns don't look like poeple

>girl nods "of course, is very true. I am not a human."

>as if this explains anything

>"I come from gun, I am gun"

>brooding silence with more tea

>ask her why she isn't shooting me

>"would never shoot owner, then would have no one to play with."

>ask why she's in my house

>she's looking like she's conversing with a retard

>"this is where you keep me, we are comrades now"

>explain that I'm not a communist

>she brushes the statement off with a wave of the hand

>"no one perfect, as long as much shootings we will be fine."

>leave to go to work

>gotta be that poorfag supporting the banking cabal

>girl waves from the door "have good day working for jew masters, capitalist wage slave!"

>the sincere smile and wave rubs the salt a bit deeper

>cab of a T800 is usually a relaxing place away from people

>3208 cat laced with the turbo is better music than anything than nashville could ever produce

>can't seem to enjoy it

>that damn girl is eating away at my thoughts

>go through the events of the morning

>haven't made any real progress on the issue when I pull up into the driveway

>greeted by an entrenched fighting position containing a little girl holding a mosin taller then she is

>glad there's no HOA

>first she moves in and then digs up the lawn

>reach down to drag her out and give her a dressing-down

>instead get it reversed

>she's demanding to know why there's no garden

>specifcally, why there's no potatoes

>tell her clean up her shit

>if she wants potatoes she can plant them herself

>she's indignant "do I look like plow? Is gun!"

>tell her that she isn't acting like a gun

>compare her to a termite

>get a pouty face complete with puffy cheeks in response

>try to be the adult

>promise to think about the garden for the back yard if she cleans up her hole

>instant mood change

>she's skreetching and running around my legs in circles

>turn around to unlock the door

>girl barges past dusting off her hands

>go to close the door

>catch sight of perfect, unmarred lawn

>making dinner

>ask girl if she wants some

>she declines but will sit for more tea

>tell her that I think she's a fairy

>she cocks her head

>explain that it's like a sprit

>huge shit eating grin "yes, yes! you're not so dumb!"

>her bait is bad and she should feel bad

>ask if she has a name

>the way she says it sounds like mois nuggan

>decide she'll be called nugget

>head to the couch

>pick up the canucks vs l.a. game

>fall asleep at first intermission

>wake up in overtime to find the rifle across my knees

>nugget is snuggled up against my chest fast asleep

>she seems bigger somehow

>damn ghost/sprit/fairy thing might be an asshole, but she's kinda cute when she's like this

>wrap an arm around her

>the soft snoring gets an added "meep" before we both pass back into sleep

>wake up to a shirt soaked with a dinner plate pool of drool and cold lap

>sun beating in the blindless window

>extract from the couch and peel the slimy shirt off

>hit the three "s" again

>come back down to find a pot of tea brewing and a small pansy in a vase on the table

>fucking gun ghost

>she might be alright

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